I am Going to Thailand.

October 6th (Wednesday) 2010
7:54 a.m.
I'm going to Thailand.
I'm going to Thailand.
I'm going to Thailand.
I'm going to Thailand.
I'm going to Thailand.
I'm going to Thailand.
I'm going to Thailand.
I prayed that God would send me somewhere hard, to minister to orphans beaten and starving. I prayed that He would send me somewhere outside of the USA and for longer than a month. I prayed that wherever He called me, I would go;and I asked that He would just absolutely break my heart for the people He would be putting me among. I never guessed that my many, selfish prayers would take the form of Thailand.
Thailand. I picture skinny Asian people with bowls filled with ramen noodles.
Thailand. I think of how Mrs. Chrissy told me that less than one percent of the ENTIRE country is Christian, so the few that ARE are ON FIRE. I imagine us dancing in through the streets, rejoicing in the freedom that Christ gives.
Thailand. I picture little girls dressed in red with numbers pinned to their dresses being sold for sex five to seven times a night--if not more. Some as young as three. Three. They've been brutally stripped of not only their childhood and freedom, but of their VERY NAME. There only a number among many in a dark brothel. Unspeakable horror stories smother their young hearts.
I'm going there? If I had known, would I have prayed so ardently for all those things? My courage--or lack of--doubts it. And now it quavers.
Because I am going to Thailand.


I am still so stunned that basically almost all my prayers on what I would like concerning where God sent me were answered. But really, my idiocy stuns me even more! I prayed that my Father would send me somewhere hard, where I could love on orphans beaten and deeply hurt? What...what is that?! I'm only fifteen, and in my arrogance I thought that God could drop me in some messy, uncomfortable situation that would completely wreck and break me, and I could handle that? Geez, I even asked for it.
I think I have a habit of believing more in my--suppose--abilities than is wise. But still. I asked for this, and the Lord has called me, what else can I do but answer and go? I want to go, I do. More than anything. Even though the thoughts of how unprepared I am and what I will see while I'm there scare me more than Criminal Minds--which is a lot. But the Lord is kind, and oh so gracious, and He is igniting within me a passion and longing to embrace and love the Thai people that was never there before. I've been doing a lot of research on the stats and needs of the country. Like I said earlier, less than ONE PERCENT is Christian, there are approximately 75,000 prostitutes at the moment there and everyday at least 45o,000 Thai men visits those beautiful, hurting prostitutes. I don't know about you, but I can't even process these numbers.
A little information: I will be staying with good friends of my family, the Espys, who are moving there in just a few weeks. I will be leaving near the end of May and returning home sometime in August. While I am there I will basically be the Espys slave (which, I'm cool with because they are A-W-E-S-O-M-E), and possibly helping with English classes and at an orphanage that has rescued human trafficking victims. The more I learn about Thailand, the more my Lord breaks my heart apart for these people and the more it becomes apparent that they as a whole just need to run into the Father's arms and except His redemption that redeems ourselves and our lives.
I'm excited, because I'm going to Thailand.


In case you're interested--which I hope you are--I strongly recommend these videos which will open your eyes to Thailand's needs even more:
http://vimeo.com/5567030
http://vimeo.com/12015755
http://love146.org/love-story

Always,
Betsie